For"give" to For"get"

Greetings!

Here are some thoughts on what they meant by 'forgive and forget' when they started saying it. (And why it is better than 'give and get' and of course 'get and give' or 'get and get' .......)

For-give = Give 'before' you get
Means: Give love, compassion, trust etc before getting back (or irrespective of not getting) any love,compassion, trust in return.

For-get = Get 'before' you get
Means: After you really forgive, you get the "happiness released when you give" even before getting the love, compassion, trust, or a simple thank-you (or irrespective of not getting even a thanks).

If you notice here, none of the 2 activities are really dependent on 'others' and hence can be done without giving any reasons (pointing fingers). It is very very simple, but for our bloated egos that we have to carry on our heads.



Here is a recent conversation with a Rikshawallah (RW) which made me think. Let me know what this makes you think?

RW: Sir, we really don't see decent customers like you anymore these days!! (I had just taken a seat, we had not even seen each other's faces. Means, he had something that he wanted to say and i happened to be there)

ME:hmmm... (best reply)

RW: Take the case of that girl, seemed well educated, from good family too... (etc etc... basically the girl boarded auto after getting down from a bus; half way to her home remembered that she forgot important documents in bus; asked the RW to drive back as fast as possible; he did it irrespective of danger of accident, getting caught - then reached the bus just as it had started; then drove her back to home... at the end after dropping, RW says....) ... I quoted exactly the fare as per the meter and this girl... she asked for the fare card to verify it! She paid it and went even without saying 'thanks'!

ME: many interspersed sounds akin to hmmm... and oh...

RW: Now I have taken a vow to not help any one... it is just fruitless.

ME: Why?

RW: (Gave me a look like 'ramayan dekhne ke baad puchta hai ram ki sita koun ??!!)

ME: Ok. i understand that you have taken a lot of trouble but she has not been good to you.... but we whatever good we do to others it may come our way from someone else... remember people who have been helpful to you and for whom you had not been able to do anything... (here i saw him move little... ) and when you did it - did you do it thinking that she will say thank you or pay you extra 50 Rs. ?? if not then why are you worrying now. When you took this additional trouble - didn't you feel happy just because you helped her in her time of need?

RW: You are right! (Now my turn to get surprised) I have wasted my whole day thinking on this episode. Now I am feeling better, it is not necessary that she only should give gratitude back to me - it can come any way!

To tell you all the truth, these thoughts just sprang out while talking to the Rikshawallah. But felt that, it is worth noting down; who knows someone might read this and may be it will make (the rest of…) his day (or life)!

Sincerely Mine!
Anand P Kulkarni

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